The Impact of Islam on Personal Freedom and Identity

As a woman who left Islam, my journey has been a complex one marked by both positive and negative experiences. While Islam has affected me negatively, I believe it is crucial to understand the underlying dynamics at play.

The Nature of Islam

From my perspective, Islam, as practiced by many, has a stifling effect on personal freedom and identity. The strict adherence to religious rules and the perceived expectations of a divine entity, such as Allah, can create a suffocating environment. For instance, I felt that an all-pervading presence of religion in my daily life, dictated by the Sunnah of the Prophet, left me with a sense of being constantly monitored and judged.

Early Struggles with Islamic Restrictions

Before I fully understood Islam, it was already affecting my life negatively through everyday interactions and familial restrictions. The strict rules governing various aspects of life, including education and personal relationships, made my life unbearable. Fortunately, my involvement in a boarding school offered a reprieve from the stringent Islamic environment at home.

My experience in the boarding school was transformative. There, I discovered my love for various forms of art, sports, and interpersonal connections. I became more practical, logical, and bold, qualities that were unacceptable under my family’s strict religious practices. My passion for art, music, and dance—activities that were considered un-Islamic—wasn't just stifled but outright banned. This period, however, also taught me the value of freedom and the importance of my individuality.

The Demise of Personal Potential

My dad eventually pulled me out of boarding school, forcing me back into an environment where my freedom was severely curtailed. The move was a significant blow to my personal growth and creativity. With my family controlling every aspect of my life, I was no longer able to explore my interests or interact with friends freely. This period, from the age of 13 to 20, was marked by a lack of opportunity to pursue my passions.

The Aftermath and Reflection

For years, I struggled to adapt and rebuild my life after the restrictions. The loss of my interests, friends, and the freedom to make choices according to my own will left me emotionally scarred. I faced constant pressure to conform and had to endure the ridicule and hatred of my family, including my father, for questioning religious norms.

The loss of my innocence and the trust in those who should have protected me has made it challenging to trust others. My relationships with people, including other Muslims, are now guarded to the point of avoiding them. However, I still hold my own will dear and choose to live by my own morals, even if it means living a life that's more challenging than adherence to strict religious practices.

The broader question remains: What is religion without its followers? Without Muslims to follow and interpret the guidelines of Islam, the religion loses its impact. Islamic teachings, as I've experienced, thrive on human weaknesses and, at times, suppress individual freedoms and identities.

So, is Islam to blame for the negative experiences of its followers? Arguably, a religion’s impact is heavily influenced by how its followers interpret and practice it. For those who experience negative outcomes, it might be necessary to re-evaluate the role religion plays in their lives.